Even though I have a few more things to post about life here in AF I haven't felt like it as some dear friends of mine just lost their precious little baby boy, he was born very early and for whatever reason it wasn't meant to be that he stay here on earth. I have lost quite a few people in my family over the years so the experience of a loved one passing is not so unfamiliar to me, my great grandmother, maternal grandmother, sister, maternal grandfather my mother and paternal grandmother have all passed, the earliest of course was my great grandmother and at age 8 or so I was really too young to grasp any real understanding or sense of sadness but as the years have progressed and my family has dwindled I have a new perspective. Its always sad to loose someone but when they are older it almost seems natural and although we still miss them its easier to accept that their time here on earth is done but for those who leave this life earlier than we ever expected it is harder, or at least it has been for me. From these experiences it seems cruel somehow that life keeps going on all around you when this momentous occasion has happened in your life, how can something that has touched and affected you so deeply and left a huge whole in your life go so unnoticed, I feel like even if it's just for a brief second the world should just stop in acknowledgement. It never will and life will go on, and, as always time will help, it doesn't ever heal completely but makes things more bearable. So in recognition for that sweet baby boy this is the only part of my world that I can pause, and for his amazing mother and father I sent out my heart.